Doing SOJ's and SOIC's by hand does not require soldering one lead at a time. Start out by tacking two opposite corners just to hold the part in place as you start the real soldering at a third corner. You just flood the entire side with solder, using a tip that covers two or three leads at once, leaving lots of bridges. When you're done with both (or all four) sides doing that, then hold it vertically and go from top to bottom of each side again with the iron, and all the excess solder comes off on the iron, leaving an even amount of solder on every pin, just right. It's amazing how easy it is! It's helpful, but not imperative, to use extra flux. If you do use extra flux, then you have to wash the whole gooey mess off.
Arlet tells of, and shows the results of, his solderwick method of hand-soldering an FPGA with 0.5mm lead spacing, where he uses the solderwick to apply the solder rather than remove excess. Beautiful! See his post at
viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2747&p=29941#p29941 .
Hand-soldering chip capacitors and resistors is easy enough with a tiny soldering iron down to approximately 0805 size. 1206 is really easy. 0603 is starting to get harder.
Pololu will make solderpaste stencils from your gerber file and they're not very expensive either; but solderpaste's shelf life is pretty short which may not be practical for non-commercial applications where we would go months (or years) between uses.
I do like wire wrap though, for one-off digital stuff. You can get perfboard with planes on both sides if you reall want good AC performance. I have a page on WW Q&A at
http://wilsonminesco.com/6502primer/WireWrap.html and on getting good AC performance at
http://wilsonminesco.com/6502primer/construction.html with links at the bottom to related forum topics and to ap. notes.
For making custom PCBs, I might still use
some thru-hole, and socket the PLCCs. (I have damaged an I/O IC a time or two by what I connected to it, so being able to replace it quickly without damaging the board was a plus.) Connectors should usually be thru-hole also, so they don't peel up the foils on the PCB. A few parts actually take
more room in SMT, to allow for leads that come out the sides instead of going through the board underneath, or sit up on a platform that needs solder fillets around it (like electrolytic capacitors). Thru-hole also lets you put parts under parts in some cases, so its density can be higher than one might have thought. There's nothing wrong with doing a mix of thru-hole and SMT. As you noted, some parts (especially logic ICs) are only available in SMT. I've been getting some key 74ABT parts as I find them available, but I've had to get some of them in SMT (SOIC), then use the SOIC-to-DIP adapters if I want thru-hole.